Please stop telling me to eat more.
Anyone who knows me know’s how much I eat. My friends always say they are jealous of me being able to eat what ever I want (as long as it’s gluten free) and not have to worry about my weight.
But, I do worry about my weight. I worry a lot, I have always struggled to put on weight and it does restrict me on what I can wear. I have to sometimes shop in the children’s section which is handy as it’s cheaper but I don’t want to look like I am 5.
When I found out I was pregnant it was such a relief to think that I will finally put on weight and hopefully give me a better shape after having the baby. Well, that didn’t go to plan. I only put on a few pounds when I was pregnant and now I have lost even more weight then what I was before I was pregnant.
I have recently been getting really bad anxiety about what to wear and I find myself not making any effort for myself. I seem to only wear long sleeved tops and jeans, I hate my collar bones and they really stick out at the moment. I used to be so more confident and I think it’s about time I try a lot more to change the way I feel.
I don’t like the fact I don’t have curves or even a bum, my collar bones stick out way to much so I have stopped wearing cut off shoulder tops. I don’t really like myself in any type of dress at the moment either so I am going to really struggle on holiday. I have even brought swimming costumes to wear just in case I don’t put weight on as I don’t want my ribs and hips to stick out to much.
I think it is so rude when people talk about anybody’s weight, you would exactly tell someone that they have put too much weight on. I have been keeping how I feel to myself and I am not proud of myself.
I have started to eat a lot more healthier and focus on more food that has a lot more protein in. I drink weight gainer milkshakes and I have been doing some exercises at home. I am hoping this will start to help a different as I want to be back to my confident self.
If anyone has been through this and feels similar to me or if you have any tips and tricks on how to help me gain some weight Please email me or comment below.
I wanted to upload before & after pictures but I am really not comfortable doing this just yet.